it’s cool to be told I’m immature for not being able to properly handle literally yhe most humiliating thing i’ve ever done. for having gone through with it, had it fail, and then not having the composure to do it again because if I had to in that moment I would have vomited everywhere.
i screamed into my hands when i got in the car, I tore at myself. and to see your message that I have no right to be mad at you? that I should be sorry for not having the maturity? just because you made it seem like you offered to do it with me, and I told you I was scared to do it alone because what the fuck would I do by myself if it’s positive. what do I do?and then you give me a hostile ultimatum and tell me I frustrate the shit out of you.
did it not occur to you that I didn’t want to be alone in that moment because that is soething I dont know how to handle.
I have never regretted telling you something before. And right now I have never regretted something so much in my life.